The Pressure to Succeed

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“So, what are you now doing?” they ask.

“I’m resting”, I answer. They laugh unbelievably and I ask why? I shouldn’t rest after spending 4 years in the university? Is it easy to burn midnight candles during the four years hoping, ‘when I graduate, I will rest small’, only for you to get out and people start pressuring you. 

The exact day I graduated, someone already asked me, “Congratulations Rolake. So, what next?” 

Ahnahnn. Shebi you will allow me to land first. Na wa o. 

The funniest thing is, not everyone pressures outrightly. 

For instance, not everyone will ask if you have started working. Some people pressure in a very subtle manner. E.g. ‘Oh, you’re still at home. So, what are you doing now?”. It can be very annoying, but what can man do. Some people don’t even mean any harm but because someone has asked you before and you feel rushed, that’s why it’s irritating to you. 

Pressure has to do with time and action. ‘So, when are you doing this and that. What are you doing?’ All these happens before you start working or while you are waiting to start earning big. The pressure to succeed. The pressure to make it. The pressure to start doing something. 

Look. Pressure is good but do not be intimidated. 

See ehn, resting after school a little is not even a bad thing. Let me calm my nerves abeg😂. There is this joy that comes with sleeping and knowing you don’t have book to read or work to do the next day. Very sweet. 

The thing is, you now see people making it on social media, you read people’s stories, but you are still here, not working yet. When you see your mates going to work, interning, starting businesses, buying their first cars. You start to think, ‘at least, these people are better than me, they are doing something, what am I even doing with my life’. So, every thing starts to look dark and hazy. That’s even where fear and anxiety sets in. 

You see your mates, ahead of you in life. Buying their first houses, getting big contracts. And you, you are just there, pushing your small business. You see them spending your whole year’s salary on one bottle of wine. You start to think, ‘and these are my mates o, what am I doing with my life’. Pressure. 

Hmm. 

Let’s take a look at the palm tree (oil palm) and a maize plant. 

An oil palm takes about four years to produce after it has been planted. On the other hand, a maize plant takes 3-4 months to produce corn.

The fact that maize takes just 4 months to yield does not render it invalid right? I mean, we roast and boil corn. We can even make pap from it. We enjoy it. It’s serving its own purpose. Good. 

However, you can’t compare it to the palm tree. It takes 4 years to grow and every part of it can be used for something! From the leaves(broom), to the fruit(palm oil), to the fluid(palm wine), even the seed(kernel oil) and what is covering it can be used. You can see that literally every part of it is useful. 

Meanwhile, this tree that yields and carries so much, took long to deliver. Very fruitful tree. It had its own season. When it finally came, it was exceedingly useful. 

But, don’t ignore the fact that while the palm tree is preparing to bear its fruit, there is still something useful in its body. I mean, you can use its leaves to make broom. It’s not just standing, producing nothing. It is incubating but still producing something. 

Do you get it? 

Don’t compare you, that you know still has to figure out some things to someone who has it all figured out or someone that just wants to rush into things. 

Don’t be frightened. I know the buildup can be so uncomfortable, because you can literally feel it in your chest. You are not making money yet. You want to live THE lifestyle. You want to be a millionaire before a certain age but things seem slow. 

The pressure to start making it is there. Your heart skips a beat when someone asks you what you are doing because you know you are not working yet. 

Yes, the pressure can be a motivation. Pressure is not entirely bad. It could push you to do more or start something. But, I’m here to tell you not to be intimidated. Don’t let anyone tension you. 

Moreover, what makes the tree grow? Sunlight, rain, air and the right nutrients right? Perfect.

Let me be truthful with you. To continue feeling this pressure and doing nothing about it is the worst. It is even worse than the pressure itself. So, instead of brooding and dwelling too much on the pressure, start doing something. 

You can start investing in yourself. You can read books, take a free online course that interests you. It could be the time to start planning strategically and discovering things that interest you. You could be going for conferences or even start a side hustle or your passion if you want. That is your own incubation period. 

It could even be that you are already working but you aren’t making the type of money you want yet. I mean, when you were younger, you used to say you would have started making millions at your age, but it’s not here yet. But, you are improving on your skills, gaining more experience, working on yourself, planning well. 

Nobody can tell you rubbish because you are doing something! 

Doing this will give you a level of confidence at the sight of the pressure because you know you aren’t idle. You are doing your own thing, working towards your goal. And, it’s not anyone’s business. You have a direction. 

YOU ARE A PROCESS. A WORK IN PROGRESS. 

Like the palm tree, I’m sure if other plants like mr maize and mr cassava (the fast bloomers) are asking it while it’s growing that, “what’s even wrong with this one. Since all these days they’ve planted you, why is your fruit not coming?” 

It will tell them, ‘Shut up! Can’t you see my leaves? Are they not useful? But, I’m still coming o, I’ve not arrived yet. You can’t tension me sha.’

You get the drill? Yes. Exactly. 

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Shoutout to Oluwatoyosi Fagbuyi, a gift in the form of a friend. She suggested this topic. It has always been on my mind but I never thought of writing about it. Thank you Toyosi. 

Thank you my Limitless fam for reading. Did you learn something? Oya drop a comment😁. Don’t forget to share with at least two people! 

Till we meet again next Saturday, bye!